Scissors Paper Rock just played a Christmas party in Wollongong, and it got the band thinking… what music really belongs in the xmas morning playlist?
Don’t feel peer pressured into playing traditional xmas carols, modern xmas carols or even rock xmas carols. Remarkably, the best flavour of music to play during December is exactly the same as it was for every other month of the year: not xmas carols.
There’s a reason the xmas cd only comes out of its case once a year – it’s rubbish. Anyone who is releasing xmas carols is almost certainly broke and finished – otherwise, they’d write an album of real music and release it into the world confident that people would actually like their music. Instead they’re cashing in on mothers’ poor attempts to stay relevant and hip by “discovering” new “music”.
Buble used to be cool, then he realised he could get even more rich singing an afternoon of xmas music, and he wouldn’t even need to face the horror of a world tour to promote it. Even he knows that noone wants to hear jingle songs once the boxing day test has started – it’s like the antidote to this tragic festive madness. You wake up on boxing day, put on the telly, grab yourself a plate of ham and wonder why you put yourself through it every year.
Like every other addict you swear you’ll never do it again, but of course Ricky Martin’s festive sensation will be released in 11 months time and you’ll be the first to play it to your kids trumpeting how wonderful it is, and how under-utilised xmas bells are in most bands.
If the xmas purists in your house insist on festive music, then try sneaking a few of these into your playlist with loud suggestions about their tenuous and real links to joy, merriment and Christmas. Enjoy.
Snow (Hey-oh) – The Red Hot Chili Peppers
The Night Santa Went Crazy – Weird Al Yankovic
Hells Bells – AC/DC
How to Make Gravy – Paul Kelly
White Wine in the Sun – Tim Minchin
The Season’s Upon Us – Dropkick Murphys
